**中文** | **英文**
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我怀疑我的智商，但我没有证据。
|I suspect my IQ, but I have no evidence.
我的人生就像一盒巧克力，你永远不知道下一块会是什么味道，但我知道下一块肯定很甜。
|My life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're gonna get, but I know the next one will be sweet.
我是一个阳光型男孩，但是晒久了会变黑。
|I am a sunny boy, but I will turn black after being in the sun for too long.
别问我为什么这么沙雕，因为我也不知道。
|Don't ask me why I'm so silly, because I don't know either.
我的梦想是当一名废人，但现实却逼着我当一个更厉害的废人。
|My dream is to be a bum, but reality forces me to be a better bum.
我的内心住着一只猛兽，它在努力地想逃离我。
|There is a beast inside me, it is trying to escape from me.
我的人生充满了意外，比如我以为我会考上大学，结果我考上了高中。
|My life is full of surprises, for example, I thought I would go to college, but I went to high school.
我是一个坚强的人，因为我每天都在跟自己的智商作斗争。
|I am a strong person because I fight against my own IQ every day.
我的字典里没有放弃，只有“再试一次”。
|There is no"give up" in my dictionary, only"try again".
我是一个乐观的人，因为我总是相信明天会比今天更糟糕。
|I am an optimist because I always believe tomorrow will be worse than today.
我每天都过得很充实，因为我一直在思考人生的意义，但一直没想明白。
|My days are always full because I'm always thinking about the meaning of life, but I never figure it out.
我是一个善良的人，因为我从来不伤害别人，除非他们惹我。
|I am a kind person because I never hurt others, unless they provoke me.
我的目标是成为一个无所事事的人，但我还没有找到方法。
|My goal is to be a person who does nothing, but I haven't found a way yet.
我的人生就像一部恐怖片，因为我总是被自己的智商吓到。
|My life is like a horror movie because I am always scared by my own IQ.
我是一个非常有原则的人，比如不喝冷水，因为我怕冷。
|I am a very principled person, for example, I don't drink cold water because I'm afraid of the cold.
我的人生就像一场游戏，但我总是玩得很烂。
|My life is like a game, but I always play badly.
我的生活充满了乐趣，比如今天早上我发现我穿反了衣服。
|My life is full of fun, like this morning I found out I was wearing my clothes backwards.
我是一个非常自信的人，因为我知道我什么都不会。
|I am a very confident person because I know I can't do anything.
我的人生目标是成为一个快乐的废人。
|My life goal is to be a happy bum.
我的字典里没有“不可能”，只有“还没试过”。
|There is no"impossible" in my dictionary, only"haven't tried it yet".
我是一个非常有才华的人，因为我有很多奇思妙想，但大部分都不可行。
|I am a very talented person because I have a lot of ideas, but most of them are not feasible.
我是一个很浪漫的人，因为我经常幻想自己会遇到一个很帅/很漂亮的人，然后他们会爱上我，但现实告诉我，我只能幻想。
|I am a very romantic person because I often fantasize about meeting a handsome/beautiful person, and then they will fall in love with me, but reality tells me that I can only fantasize.
我的人生就像一部喜剧片，因为我总是被自己蠢哭了。
|My life is like a comedy because I am always made cry by my own stupidity.
我的智商就像我的体重，一直在努力地突破极限。
|My IQ is like my weight, it's always trying to break through the limit.
我是一个很自律的人，因为我每天都会给自己制定很多计划，但第二天就都忘了。
|I am a very disciplined person because I make many plans for myself every day, but I forget them all the next day.
我是一个很有原则的人，比如不穿高跟鞋，因为我怕摔倒。
|I am a very principled person, for example, I don't wear high heels because I'm afraid of falling.
我的生活充满了惊喜，比如今天我突然发现我还有钱可以花。
|My life is full of surprises, like today I suddenly realized I still have money to spend.
我是一个非常有毅力的人，因为我坚持每天都吃早餐，但经常忘记自己吃过了什么。
|I am a very persistent person because I insist on having breakfast every day, but I often forget what I ate.
我的梦想是成为一个旅行家，但我没有钱，所以我只能在梦里旅行。
|My dream is to be a traveler, but I have no money, so I can only travel in my dreams.
我是一个很会做饭的人，但我经常忘记自己做过了什么，然后又做一遍。
|I am a good cook, but I often forget what I have made and then make it again.
我的人生就像一首歌，但我总是唱不完整。
|My life is like a song, but I always can't finish singing it.
我是一个很爱学习的人，但我总是学不会。
|I am a very studious person, but I always can't learn.
我的字典里没有“失败”，只有“还没成功”。
|There is no"failure" in my dictionary, only"not successful yet".
我是一个很善良的人，因为我经常把自己的东西送给别人，但别人经常不收。
|I am a very kind person because I often give my things to others, but they often don't accept them.
我是一个很会讲故事的人，但我经常忘记自己讲了什么，然后又讲一遍。
|I am a good storyteller, but I often forget what I said and then tell it again.
我的人生就像一部电影，但我总是看不懂。
|My life is like a movie, but I always can't understand it.
我是一个很会运动的人，但我总是摔倒。
|I am a very athletic person, but I always fall down.
我的梦想是成为一个艺术家，但我没有艺术细胞，所以我只能画一些奇奇怪怪的东西。
|My dream is to be an artist, but I have no artistic cells, so I can only draw some weird things.
我是一个很有想法的人，但我总是想不起来。
|I am a very thoughtful person, but I always can't remember.
我的生活充满了乐趣，比如今天我发现我学会了新的打呼噜方式。
|My life is full of fun, like today I found out I learned a new way to snore.
我是一个很会唱歌的人，但我总是跑调。
|I am a very good singer, but I always sing off-key.
我的目标是成为一个无所不能的人，但我现在还什么都不会。
|My goal is to be an omnipotent person, but I can't do anything now.
我是一个很会跳舞的人，但我总是跳得很奇怪。
|I am a very good dancer, but I always dance strangely.
我的人生就像一场旅行，但我总是迷路。
|My life is like a journey, but I always get lost.
我是一个很会写字的人，但我总是写错字。
|I am a good writer, but I always misspell words.
我的梦想是成为一个科学家，但我没有科学头脑，所以我只能研究一些奇怪的东西。
|My dream is to be a scientist, but I don't have a scientific mind, so I can only research some weird things.
我是一个很有创意的人，但我总是把自己的创意忘了。
|I am a very creative person, but I always forget my own ideas.
我的生活充满了惊喜，比如今天我发现我学会了新的说话方式。
|My life is full of surprises, like today I found out I learned a new way to speak.
我是一个很会讲笑话的人，但我总是讲得很冷。
|I am a good joke teller, but I always tell very cold jokes.
我的目标是成为一个很厉害的人，但我现在还很弱鸡。
|My goal is to be a very powerful person, but I'm still very weak now.
我是一个很会弹琴的人，但我总是弹错音。
|I am a good pianist, but I always play wrong notes.
我的人生就像一本书，但我总是翻不到自己想看的那一页。
|My life is like a book, but I always can't find the page I want to see.
我是一个很会画画的人，但我总是画得很丑。
|I am a good painter, but I always paint ugly things.
我的梦想是成为一个作家，但我没有写作天赋，所以我只能写一些奇奇怪怪的东西。
|My dream is to be a writer, but I have no writing talent, so I can only write some weird things.
我是一个很有想法的人，但我总是想不起来，然后又想了一遍。
|I am a very thoughtful person, but I always can't remember, and then I think about it again.
我的生活充满了乐趣，比如今天我发现我学会了新的走路方式。
|My life is full of fun, like today I found out I learned a new way to walk.
我是一个很会打篮球的人，但我总是投不进球。
|I am a good basketball player, but I always can't make the shot.
我的目标是成为一个很会做生意的人，但我总是亏本。
|My goal is to be a good businessman, but I always lose money.
我是一个很会做手工的人，但我总是做得很丑。
|I am a good craftsman, but I always make ugly things.
我的梦想是成为一个演员，但我没有表演天赋，所以我只能在梦里演戏。
|My dream is to be an actor, but I have no acting talent, so I can only act in my dreams.
我是一个很有想法的人，但我总是想不起来，然后又想了一遍，最后还是想不起来。
|I am a very thoughtful person, but I always can't remember, and then I think about it again, and finally I still can't remember.
我的生活充满了惊喜，比如今天我发现我学会了新的睡觉方式。
|My life is full of surprises, like today I found out I learned a new way to sleep.
我是一个很会打游戏的人，但我总是输。
|I am a good gamer, but I always lose.
我的目标是成为一个很会赚钱的人，但我总是花光钱。
|My goal is to be a good money maker, but I always spend all my money.
我是一个很会说话的人，但我总是说错话。
|I am a good talker, but I always say the wrong thing.
我的梦想是成为一个很会游泳的人，但我总是不会游泳。
|My dream is to be a good swimmer, but I always can't swim.
我是一个很有想法的人，但我总是想不起来，然后又想了一遍，最后还是想不起来，最后就放弃了。
|I am a very thoughtful person, but I always can't remember, and then I think about it again, and finally I still can't remember, and then I give up.
我的生活充满了惊喜，比如今天我发现我学会了新的吃饭方式。
|My life is full of surprises, like today I found out I learned a new way to eat.
我是一个很会骑自行车的人，但我总是摔倒。
|I am a good biker, but I always fall down.
我的目标是成为一个很会写诗的人，但我总是写不出诗。
|My goal is to be a good poet, but I always can't write poems.
我是一个很会弹吉他的人，但我总是弹错弦。
|I am a good guitarist, but I always play the wrong strings.
我的梦想是成为一个很会打鼓的人，但我总是打错节奏。
|My dream is to be a good drummer, but I always play the wrong rhythm.
我是一个很有想法的人，但我总是想不起来，然后又想了一遍，最后还是想不起来，最后就放弃了，然后又重新开始想。
|I am a very thoughtful person, but I always can't remember, and then I think about it again, and finally I still can't remember, and then I give up, and then I start thinking again.
我的生活充满了惊喜，比如今天我发现我学会了新的呼吸方式。
|My life is full of surprises, like today I found out I learned a new way to breathe.
我是一个很会打乒乓球的人，但我总是接不住球。
|I am a good ping pong player, but I always can't catch the ball.
我的目标是成为一个很会做演讲的人，但我总是紧张得说不出话来。
|My goal is to be a good speaker, but I always get nervous and can't speak.
我是一个很会做家务的人，但我总是忘记做。
|I am a good housekeeper, but I always forget to do housework.
我的梦想是成为一个很会写代码的人，但我总是写出bug。
|My dream is to be a good coder, but I always write bugs.
我是一个很有想法的人，但我总是想不起来，然后又想了一遍，最后还是想不起来，最后就放弃了，然后又重新开始想，最后还是想不起来，最后就放弃了，最后就放弃了。
|I am a very thoughtful person, but I always can't remember, and then I think about it again, and finally I still can't remember, and then I give up, and then I start thinking again, and finally I still can't remember, and then I give up, and then I give up.
我的生活充满了惊喜，比如今天我发现我学会了新的思考方式。
|My life is full of surprises, like today I found out I learned a new way to think.
我是一个很会打羽毛球的人，但我总是打不到球。
|I am a good badminton player, but I always can't hit the shuttlecock.
我的目标是成为一个很会做菜的人，但我总是做不出好吃的菜。
|My goal is to be a good cook, but I always can't make delicious food.
我是一个很会玩乐器的人，但我总是不会弹奏。
|I am a good musician, but I always can't play instruments.
我是一个很有想法的人，但我总是想不起来，然后又想了一遍，最后还是想不起来，最后就放弃了，然后又重新开始想，最后还是想不起来，最后就放弃了，最后就放弃了，最后就放弃了。
|I am a very thoughtful person, but I always can't remember, and then I think about it again, and finally I still can't remember, and then I give up, and then I start thinking again, and finally I still can't remember, and then I give up, and then I give up, and then I give up.
我的生活充满了惊喜，比如今天我发现我学会了新的生活方式。
|My life is full of surprises, like today I found out I learned a new way of life.
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